Confessions
by akissinneverland
Summary: Post!Neverland AU: Things in Emma's life are going crazy, problem after problem piling on top of the other and avoiding Killian is causing even more trouble. Their confrontation leads to some life altering confessions.


"One cocoa _without_ cinnamon," Belle said, sliding the cup to her. She'd been working there since the library had been destroyed and was confused by Emma's odd drink order.

"Thank you," Emma said taking a sip, relief flooding through her as the warm liquid slid down her throat. The last week had been a crazy one, and she needed to get away and unwind, and the diner was the closest she could get to that. She'd gotten a room upstairs to get away from her family and hadn't visited the ship since Gold had gotten Neal back again. She'd had a lot of things to think over and being alone was helpful and miserable all at once. But this quiet moment of solace was actually doing her some good.

"Emma," she heard his voice flow through the air, causing her to go rigid. She felt the heat radiating off of him, rolling over her back as he stood behind her. "I think it's time we had a chat, love."

"Not right now, please," she gritted out through her teeth, taking a big swig of her cocoa, trying to ignore him.

"Well when then?" He asked louder, and she could feel everyone's eyes on them. "I'm getting tired of waiting around for you, _Swan_."

Emma groaned and grabbed Killian by the wrist, pulling him with her out of Granny's diner. He'd pulled a low move by confronting her inside, and she was determined to have any kind of conversation with him in private. She could hear him going on and on behind her, but she finally got him out the door and down the stairs.

"Would you be quiet, Hook?" she said in a loud whisper.

"Oh, so we're back to Hook, are we?" He pulled his wrist from her grasp, forcing her to turn and look at him. "And I will not keep quiet. Not when you're acting like this."

"You didn't have to corner me in the diner and try to make a scene." She was desperately trying to get him to lower his voice, but he was having none of it.

"Obviously I did. It's the only way I've been able to get you to say two words to me in the past week," Killian said, looking at her expectantly.

Emma opened her mouth to defend herself but no words came out. It had been true. She'd done everything to avoid him all week after everything in her life had started to come to a head. Her secret relationship with Killian had been discovered by her family, Henry catching him kissing her in the doorway of the apartment, Emma was allowing Henry to stay with Regina again, Neal had seemingly come back from the dead, and-

Killian shook his head knowingly, taking her lack of answer as confirmation to his unspoken thoughts. "Ever since your family found out about us, you've been avoiding me like I'm some disease ridden leper. It's easy to see why you had us hide whatever this was, ashamed of the old sea dog, I take it."

"How could you even think that? I didn't tell them about us because… Well, you have the black eye to prove how 'hit first, ask later' David is."

Killian continued, not even letting her words register. She could tell he was furious and had obviously thought out what he'd wanted to say, and he was going to say it. "Or is this about Baelfire? He's waltzed back into your life, and you're having second thoughts about us," he said, sure of himself. "I should've known I would come second in that race."

Tears had started to prick at her eyes at his accusation. "Do you think any of this has been easy for me, having him come back into my life to screw it up again? I was happy for once, Killian. _Happy!_ Do you know how long it's been since I've been happy? Years!"

Killian gave her a pointed look. "I think I can sympathize, love," he said seriously, but anger still boiled beneath the surface. She knew he understood more than anyone with the centuries of torture he had to endure in Neverland of being alone with only the mere memory of Milah.

"That's not…" She trailed off running her hand over her face. "I wasn't trying to demean what you've gone through. We've both been happier with each other, I know. You know it, too." Emma lowered her voice then. "Things have just been difficult lately, and I don't know how to deal with everything. There are things we need to talk about, but we shouldn't talk about them here." She crossed her arms over her chest defensively then, still leaving the space between them.

"What are you so afraid of, Emma?" He asked, his arms shooting out from his sides.

"That you're going to leave," Emma said quietly. She'd never quite felt so vulnerable in years, and she hated that they were out in the open. "There are things happening right now, and I'm so scared that _you're_ going to get scared and leave me. That's how it happens always happens. Someone gets scared, and someone leaves me. My parents were scared they couldn't break the curse so they sent me here. August was terrified of staying in the foster system, so he left me alone. Neal was afraid he'd have to face his father so he left me to go to jail. I was finally opening up to Graham, and Regina…" Emma stopped before the tears could fall, breathing in and out to collect herself. They'd talked at length about Graham during their nights on his ship, coming to terms with the fact that they knew both exactly what it was like to lose someone that way. "Regina took him. And you've left before…"

"You've left me, too, Emma," Killian said, taking a step forward but not reaching out to touch her. She had her arms wrapped around herself, a defensive position he'd seen many times and knew not to crowd her. He made sure she was looking him the eyes as he continued. "But I came back, Emma. I came back, and I helped you find your son. Remember all those nights in Neverland when I helped keep you grounded when all hope was lost. Why won't you let me help you this time?"

"Because this _is_ different," she tried to reason.

"You're right. It is different. You've been off since before Baelfire returned, and you won't open up to me," Killian said, starting to grow tired. "I know something is going on, because you know I can read you so easily, so why won't you just-"

"I'm pregnant, okay?" She finally shouted, a weight the size of the earth lifting from her shoulders at her admission. Her eyes fell shut, as she let out a sigh of relief, feeling so light after having kept that secret for weeks, before she realized she'd actually told him. Emma prepared for the onslaught of shouts and the cursing of her existence, but they never came. Slowly, she opened her eyes, not expecting Killian to be just standing there, openly staring in awe at her still flat stomach. The look caught her by surprise, not having expected this kind of reaction. They'd talked about his interactions with Neal, but the discussion of having his own children had never come up.

"You're…" He trailed off, taking a tentative step toward her as if she'd disappear any second. His hand instinctively started to lift from his side, but he stopped himself before he got too close. "You're carrying my child?"

Tears welled up in her eyes again, and she was going to blame it on the hormones. She hadn't expected the sheer open look of joy on his face as he pointed to her stomach with his outstretched hand. She could tell he was taking this at her pace, her arms still wrapped around herself as her last line of defense. Watching as his fingers flexed the tiniest amount, she knew all he wanted to do was just touch her. Dropping her arms, she moved forward just a bit, slowly reaching for his hand and placing where he longed to have it. He gasped at the contact, and she could see the fear behind his eyes now. "What is it?"

"I never…" He cleared his throat. "I never thought I would have this, Emma… My past is dark and bleak, and what I was does not deserve to have a child with you."

Her face dropped at his words, and she backed away again. "See? You're just like everyone else! I don't know why I expec-"

A squeak of surprise left her as his mouth crashed against hers to keep her from finishing the sentence. She could vaguely hear cheers from inside the diner, her senses being taken over completely by him, but it didn't last as he was pulling his lips back just as quickly as he'd placed them on hers.

Resting his forehead against hers, he brought his hand back to her stomach. "But I am not the monster I once was. You brought out Killian Jones from the depths of my soul when I thought he was lost for good." He sighed, moving back a bit to look her in the eyes. "I won't pretend to know a thing about fatherhood. As you know, mine left me, and I had to grow up too quickly. But I can promise you this, Emma. We'll work at this together, and if you'll help me, I'll be the best father all the realms have ever seen."

Emma let out a shaky breath then, her hand moving to cover his. "You're not angry?"

Killian chuckled, shaking his head. "How could I be angry? Emma, you given me the best second chance anyone could ask for. This is a right lot better than you being in love with Baelfire."

"Well, since I'm already in love with you, I don't see how that would work," she said without thinking, before closing her mouth into a tight line. But when she didn't see surprise on his face, confusion spread across hers.

"Open book, love," Killian said, pressing a small kiss to her lips. "I love you, as well." He stood up straight then, wrapping his hand around hers that had been covering it. "Come, we should go back to your place. I'd like to keep some mystery alive in our relationship," he said, tugging her past the gate outside the diner, down the street toward her apartment.

"Why are we going to my place?"

"To talk to your father." Killian gave her hand a squeeze, smiling down at her. "I think it's about bloody time I declare my intentions to marry you."


End file.
